I've always been insecure about my vagina after childbirth. I had forceps. I was cut from one end to the other. My then-husband never seemed bothered by it, and neither did the men I dated afterward — not until I hit my "cougar phase" and started seeing a man ten years younger.
We were together, in broad daylight, when he made a comment about how it looked. I won't repeat his exact words, but the gist was that it looked like it had been through a war. I was mortified.
That comment sent me down a research rabbit hole. I wanted to understand my options — not because I thought I needed to change for anyone, but because the insecurity was mine, and it had been mine for years, long before that moment gave it a name.
The Consultation That Changed How I Saw the Whole Thing
I found Dr. Darren Lazare in Vancouver, highly recommended, and booked a consultation. I told him what had happened. He listened, then said something I still think about: that guy was in the wrong, there was nothing wrong with my body, and — because he had three boys of his own at home — he'd be having a conversation with them that night about how to talk to and about women.
Then he told me something I wasn't expecting from a cosmetic doctor: he didn't want to do the procedure if it was for someone else. He asked me to take a week, sit with it, and come back only if it was something I wanted for myself.
I already knew the answer. This had been my own hang-up long before anyone else's opinion got involved. So I went back.
What Actually Happened, Procedure by Procedure
I had four sessions in total — I could only afford four at the time, and it was around $4,000 for the series (pricing has likely changed since 2022; always confirm current rates directly with a provider). Dr. Lazare ended up including an extra touch-up at no charge because I wasn't fully happy with where things landed after round four.
Here's what the sessions actually felt like: numbing cream was applied inside and out, and I waited about ten minutes for it to take effect. Then the internal RF wand went in, starting low and building in intensity gradually — he checked in with me the whole way and let me control the pace. It wasn't painful at first. As the intensity increased, it got more uncomfortable, and I have a low pain tolerance, so take that with a grain of salt. By sessions two through four, I was the one asking him to turn it up.
I also had microneedling done externally to address the looser, crepey texture that bothered me — this is the part of the treatment (often marketed under names like Morpheus8V) that combines radiofrequency energy with microneedling to tighten the internal vaginal walls while also remodeling the outer labial tissue, giving it a fuller, smoother look.
The Result
I'm thrilled with how it turned out. I'm thrilled with the clinic, the staff, and Dr. Lazare specifically — from the moment I walked into the lobby, I felt comfortable and respected the whole way through. I was told results typically last around five years before a touch-up is needed. I'm coming up on year four now, and everything is still holding up well.
What This Kind of Procedure Actually Is (For Anyone Researching Their Own Options)
If you're reading this because you're in the same headspace I was in, here's a plain-language breakdown of what's actually out there. This isn't medical advice — it's a starting point for the conversation to have with a qualified provider.
Surgical options:
Labiaplasty — surgical reshaping/reduction of the labia minora, usually for asymmetry, discomfort during activity or sex, or aesthetic preference. Typically an in-office or outpatient procedure with dissolvable stitches. National average cost is roughly $3,900–$5,100, with a broader range of $2,000–$8,000 depending on technique and provider.
Vaginoplasty — tightens the vaginal canal and pelvic floor tissue surgically, usually under general anesthesia. National average is around $6,500, with comprehensive surgical packages running $6,000–$9,000+.
Perineoplasty — reconstructs the tissue between the vagina and anus, often combined with vaginoplasty. Roughly $1,500–$8,000.
Clitoral hood reduction (hoodectomy) — removes excess hood tissue for aesthetic contour and, for some, increased sensitivity. Roughly $1,800–$13,500.
Non-surgical options:
RF microneedling (Morpheus8V and similar devices) — what I had done. Combines radiofrequency energy with microneedling to stimulate collagen production, tighten the vaginal canal, and remodel labial tissue, without incisions. Usually done as a series of 3 sessions, spaced 4–8 weeks apart, with results lasting roughly 18 months to a few years and periodic touch-ups. Package pricing generally runs $3,000–$4,500 for a series, or $1,000–$1,500 per single session.
Radiofrequency-only tightening devices (e.g., ThermiVa, Viveve, FormaV) — similar non-surgical tightening approach, generally averaging around $1,000–$1,200 per session.
None of these are covered by insurance in Canada or the US, since they're classified as cosmetic. Some employer benefits plans will cover a portion, which is what helped make mine possible.
The Point I Actually Want You to Take From This
Nobody's body owes anyone a "before" photo. Childbirth changes things. Forceps, tearing, episiotomies — these are physical realities of bringing a person into the world, not defects. If you carry insecurity about how your body looks after that, you are allowed to feel however you feel about it, and you're also allowed to do absolutely nothing about it. The only bad reason to change your body is doing it for someone else's approval. The only good reason is doing it for you.
If you do decide to explore options, find a provider who asks why before they ask how much — that conversation with Dr. Lazare mattered more to my confidence than the procedures themselves.
And if surgery or in-office treatment isn't where you're at (or even if it is, and you just want to feel good in the meantime), that's part of why we built out our intimacy product line — including pieces designed to reflect real, lived-in bodies rather than an airbrushed standard. Bodies that have given birth are still bodies worth celebrating.
This post reflects one person's personal experience and is shared for informational and community purposes. It is not medical advice. Pricing, techniques, and providers vary — always consult a licensed provider directly for a personalized consultation.
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